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Sunday, Mar 14th 2010


“Tear Down That Wall, Mister President!”

Wrong Place, Wrong Time

I am have notice this week that it is being the 200th anniversary of the collapse of the Walls of Berlin, the famous dividing line which separate the Christian West from the atheist Communist East.  Like many people, I for one would have like that wall to remain in place, if only because now we are have to put up with a free concert by Rock Omnivores U2, which are almost as old as the wall, pontificating like yet more False Popes as if one was not enough (the word Pontiff in fact is come from the place in Dublin where Bono was being born, in a manger, in a stable.  But being born in a stable does not make one a messiah.  He should remember that.)  Don’t not get me wrong though:  If people want to waste good money by giving it to a multibillionaire tax evader and his multinational conglomerate, that is their prerogative—you would not hear Jesus criticize anyone for fleecing suckers, and you won’t not hear it from me.  Is just that by making the concert a free one they are encouraging more people to listen, and that can only be bad.

This anniversary was make me think, however, that people are maybe perhaps getting the idea from the celebrations that walls are, by their nature, a bad thing, whereas in fact they can often be a force for good. You must have heard the saying “High Fences is Make Good Neighbours, Every Weekday at 6.00 p.m..” And this is a true fact. In Spain we also have a saying, which, when is literally translate, says: “Keep Up Your Guard, Satan Eats Himself, Lower Your Guard, You Shit Your Pants.” The significance is obvious, and is with this in mind that I think it is estremely important that we are not shitting our pants just for the sake of it.

Stronger, Higher, Faster

Consider for esample this map above which is show the fortified borders in the world which are meant to keep out the poor. Is clear from even a cursorary glance at it that the walls are nowhere near high or long or strong enough. Have you been to Arizona?! No, me neither, but my understand is that in some places the fence is just two teenage girls with a skipping rope. How is that going to keep out determined drug-craze job-stealing immigrants and their estended families of gang members? Unless the teenage girls have a bit of an attitude.

You can of course see where I am going with all this. In 1989, they was knocking down the wrong wall. The wall they should have knock down was the Great Wall of China! Si.  You are only need look at the photo of it above to see that it is serve no useful purpose where it is now, in the middle of bloody nowhere! And who on Earth is willing to travel all the way to China to see it? The place is full of Chinese! If I want to see Chinese people I can rent Ringu or Godzilla. Or go to Las Vegas, where they have a replica model of the Great Wall of China, which is so big you can see it from space! Not like the real one, which is rubbish.

What we are need to do is to dismantle the Great Wall, which we can quickly do by outsaucing, using the cheap Filipino labour, and then we can get them to rebuild the wall all the way along the border between America and Mexico, and all along the border between America and atheist communist Canada, and all along the West coast of Africa, which I think the Africans will also appreciate, because it send the message that there will definitely be no more slave ships travelling to the New World, and in fact all the way along the blue-dotted line on the map above where there is at the moment only administrative borders and the sea keeping people out; we can’t rely on sharks and whales forever, especially when the Chinese are eating so many of them.

The beauty is, we can get the cheap Filipino labour to build the wall with themselves on the other side, so when it is finish we will not even be able to see or hear them unless we absolutely want to, by flying over it (poor people do not have airplanes, escept for Ryanair).  Even Bono cannot find anything objectionable in this.  He will be able to fly over in his private jet and still make his poverty adverts for U2.

Therefore, I think, we should take the opportunity of this anniversary to call upon the president of China, whoever he is, and tell to him, “Tear Down That Wall, Mister President. And Then Re-Build It Around Us!”

You Are Know It Make Sense!

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