Less Politics, More Football!!

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This is a Worrying Sign

Just over a year ago there was big riots in Egypt and in Algeria by football fans who was angry about the cheating of the opposition’s players, not surprising when you consider that it was two Arab countries who was play one another. Even although there was much tut-tutting at the time about this sort of disgraceful public behaviour, many others of us was more sanguine. We said not just “Well what are you espect?” but also, “At least all these rioting fans are demonstrate a healthy nationalism and xenophobia, which will distract them from not having no jobs and also prevent them from joining some kinds of pan-Arab Muslim brotherhood. Otherwise we will have to start the Crusades again.” But now, not 18 month later, splashed all over our television screen like the incontinent sploogings of a rabid Onanist, is all the news that the Arabs are once more revolting, not against homosexuals, Israel, the idiot George Bush or even falafel prices, but this time in protest against their own masters, the very men who have given them football and foreing enemies for the last 30 years. Is a big disgrace! Some peoples are have no gratitude whatsoever.

It was start off in Tunisia, which have always struck me as a very nice place to visit, everythings considered. Unlike other Muslim countries, you can drink their lousy local beer in public and sit by the pool showing your legs. Even the ladies, if they are foreing. Everyone in Tunisia was also strike me as well-educate and able to speak Spanish or, if that was too difficult, Italian. The government also had agreed not to teach any of the natives to swim, in a deal with Silvio Berlusconi, so that none of them would ever make it by accident across to Sicily, and in return Berlusconi was send over wealthy Italians to be waited on hand and foot and also his home videos. Tunisians peoples, when I have visited there, are always very polite to your face and do not spit in your soup and, as far as I know, had also a healthy contempt for all their neighbour Arab countries, such as Morocco, Libya, Algeria, and El Salvador. Indeed, they are almost European in their contempt for Arabs. So this is what is make me so confuse now about all the protest that are going on. The Tunisians had never have it so good! They are as close to European as an Arab can be, they have a nice hot sunny country, they live under a dictatorship, the most ideal kind of government, they know the Spanish, which mean they can appreciate the best culture and civilization, so what on Earth is making them want to have a revolution? Is not make no sense!

And then, to make the matters worse, the ingrates in Egypt are see what was happen in Tunisia, and instead of saying to one another, “I see the Jews are stir it up in Tunisia. And stupid fucking Tunisians have fell for it too,” the Egyptians, who themselves are have a marvelous tradition of 300-year-old dictatorship, are say to one another, “Let’s show those Tunisian morons what a REAL revolution is,” and they are start rampaigning in the streets, showering themselves beneath police batons, and waving threatening placards such as like the one above which must make any decent person shit in their spats. And not just are they trying to outdo the Tunisians in iconoclastics, they are also try to outdo them in tourism by making a virtue of their infantile rebelliousness. Look, for instance, at the latest video here for the Egyptian Tourist Board:

And now I am hear report on Al Jazeera that the protestings have spread all over my Yemen, wherever that is, and that today in Egypt they are especting massive protests because it is the Muslim bank holiday, so it will all be kicking off for the weekend.

But not kicking off in the right way. If only the dictators of Tunisia and Egypt had have any foresight or common knowledge, they would have realized that it was time to organize a football match between their countries. Perhaps a round-robin of all the Arab countries, called the Arab League, which would have ensure that instead of trying to outdo each other in revolutioning, the ignorant masses would have been fighting in the streets over which of their countries was best at kicking a bladder between two sticks. All smart dictators are know the important of sports. That is why El Generalísimo was have Real Madrid invented.

Is a sad day when football itself is become under such pressure that nobody is able to take it seriously any more. Even in the United Kingdom, which have a queen, football is become a laughing stoke because two football commenters have been give the sack just because they are make sexist comments behind closed whores. What is the world come to when the sexism is not allowed in football? What is the point of having sport in the first place if there is not going to be allow any male bonding, competition, aggression, violence, anger, hatred, misogyny, viciousness, racism, sleazy gang bangs in motel rooms, war, nationalism, innuendo, vulgarity, drunken arguments, vindictive chanting, WAGs, roasting, and replica kits? If you are start to sissify sport by insisting on non-threatening work environments, equality, and respect for the opposition, then you must not be surprise when it stop being a useful social tool for maintaining patriarchy, discipline, and rivalry among the idiot masses. We must stand up now and loudly proclaim our support for Randy Gray and Richard Quays because if we do not, our countries too will go the same way as the Arabs.

Say It Loud and Say It Proudly: Balls NOT Jobs! Goals NOT Votes!

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