Kelly

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Kelly

“He has balls”, a Labour Party source   

elly

 d

The clasp of his handshake once reassured

prospective mothers-in-law

he’d not disappoint their daughters.

And though his infrastructure’s

in desperate need of an upgrade,

he’s confident he can get his

waterworks fit for purpose,

ladies and gentlemen, here tonight,

and those at home

watching on TV, sometime

within the next twenty

five years. And if doing so

 d

involves flogging

every last rain drop,

from Bellmullet to Garryduff,

at a savage discount, to the guy

who despite his wallet’s ongoing

morbid obesity, has hair

that looks like it’s been stuck

to the skull with Evo-stick,

then Kelly’s the kind of pragmatist

who’ll make shit like that happen,

whether anyone asked

it to or not.

 d

His tongue rough

as the carpet in a room

where Stevie Coughlan

once talked against the Jews.

For the past six months,

every erection he’s had

has been a member

of the Heavy Gang

about to throw a Provo

onto the railings

from a Garda Station

second storey window.

 d

According to recent polls,

in certain areas of Tipperary,

he’s only slightly less popular

than Richard the Third. At least

half a percent less hated

than this time last week.

Of unequivocal victory,

he has no alternative

but to be certain.

 d

KEVIN HIGGINS

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Kevin Higgins facilitates poetry workshops at Galway Arts Centre and teaches creative writing at Galway Technical Institute. He is also Writer-in-Residence at Merlin Park Hospital and the poetry critic of the Galway Advertiser. He was a founding co-editor of The Burning Bush literary magazine and is co-organiser of Over The Edge literary events in Galway City. His first collection of poems The Boy With No Face was published by Salmon in February 2005 and was short-listed for the 2006 Strong Award. His second collection, Time Gentlemen, Please, was published in March 2008 by Salmon. His work also features in the generation defining anthology Identity Parade – New British and Irish Poets (Ed Roddy Lumsden, Bloodaxe, 2010). Frightening New Furniture, his third collection of poem, was published in 2010 by Salmon Poetry. Kevin has read his work at most of the major literary festivals in Ireland and at Arts Council and Culture Ireland supported poetry events in Kansas City, USA (2006), Los Angeles, USA (2007), London, UK (2007), New York, USA (2008), Athens, Greece (2008); St. Louis, USA (2008), Chicago, USA (2009), Denver, USA (2010), Washington D.C (2011), Huntington, West Virginia, USA (2011), Geelong, Australia (2011), Canberra, Australia (2011), St. Louis, USA (2013), Boston, USA (2013) & Amherst, Massachusetts (2013). In November and December 2013 Kevin also read his work in Basel, Switzerland and Phoenix & Tucson, Arizona. Mentioning The War, a collection of his essays and reviews was published in April 2012 by Salmon. Mentioning The War has been described by Clare Daly T.D as “a really good and provocative read. It will jolt you; it will certainly touch you; make you laugh; maybe make you snarl a little bit as well, depending on where you come from or what your background is.” Kevin’s poetry has been translated into Greek, Turkish, Spanish, Italian, Japanese & Portuguese. The Ghost In The Lobby is Kevin’s fourth collection of poetry will be launched early Spring 2014.

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Kevin Higgins facilitates poetry workshops at Galway Arts Centre and teaches creative writing at Galway Technical Institute. He is also Writer-in-Residence at Merlin Park Hospital and the poetry critic of the Galway Advertiser. He was a founding co-editor of The Burning Bush literary magazine and is co-organiser of Over The Edge literary events in Galway City. His first collection of poems The Boy With No Face was published by Salmon in February 2005 and was short-listed for the 2006 Strong Award. His second collection, Time Gentlemen, Please, was published in March 2008 by Salmon. His work also features in the generation defining anthology Identity Parade – New British and Irish Poets (Ed Roddy Lumsden, Bloodaxe, 2010). Frightening New Furniture, his third collection of poem, was published in 2010 by Salmon Poetry. Kevin has read his work at most of the major literary festivals in Ireland and at Arts Council and Culture Ireland supported poetry events in Kansas City, USA (2006), Los Angeles, USA (2007), London, UK (2007), New York, USA (2008), Athens, Greece (2008); St. Louis, USA (2008), Chicago, USA (2009), Denver, USA (2010), Washington D.C (2011), Huntington, West Virginia, USA (2011), Geelong, Australia (2011), Canberra, Australia (2011), St. Louis, USA (2013), Boston, USA (2013) & Amherst, Massachusetts (2013). In November and December 2013 Kevin also read his work in Basel, Switzerland and Phoenix & Tucson, Arizona. Mentioning The War, a collection of his essays and reviews was published in April 2012 by Salmon. Mentioning The War has been described by Clare Daly T.D as “a really good and provocative read. It will jolt you; it will certainly touch you; make you laugh; maybe make you snarl a little bit as well, depending on where you come from or what your background is.” Kevin’s poetry has been translated into Greek, Turkish, Spanish, Italian, Japanese & Portuguese. The Ghost In The Lobby is Kevin’s fourth collection of poetry will be launched early Spring 2014.

 

One Response

  1. enlil

    April 2, 2015 5:01 pm

    a Wexford Senator on t.v. said that Wexford received E25m funding for housing, whilst Tipperary received E57m; is Kelly a Tipperary t.d.?
    The Social Housing Targets he announced on 1st April ’15, are an almost total wash-out: funding is to be sent to all local authorities to “tackle the issue of housing lists”. ‘Lists’. Not a word about (deliberate) insecurity of tenure and therefore effectively, virtual life-time homelessness.
    His (and Paudie Coffey’s) E1.5bn is for : building, buying and Leasing programmes.
    Their statement also says, it will be “cheaper and quicker to acquire as opposed to build” – so no prizes for guessing that the local authorities will (as a government bow to the local investors?) – Lease housing from these housing investors. And so, the ‘List’ will look less by the next election.
    No joined-up thinking by this govt. to address the actual need for actual secure homes.