Baby Jesus, mild and meek
Grant us all an outlook bleak
Guarantee a life austere
Misery throughout the year

Baby Jesus, barely born
Look upon a world forlorn
Billions facing daily strife
Promise them an afterlife

Through your death upon the cross
Exalt obedience to the boss
Put their suffering into perspective
Serve as an ideological corrective

Baby Jesus, it’s an emergency
Banish the people’s thoughts of insurgency
Justify [...]

A loose translation: Aggressive Begging for Change.
This past month has been demonstrating the various ways in which the different nationalities of the world make clear their personal innate characteristics through their response to the austerity. In Greece, the technocratic corporate government imposed by the Illuminati cabal at the head of the IMF and European [...]

“No point getting toilet paper. It will be miles away by now.”
Here is Leonardo Da Capo and Kate Wimslet above from the new movie Contagion!, which is already spreading like an incurable rash across box offices near you. The movie is telling the true story of how actors travel all around the world making films and [...]

Don’t Mention the Chocolate War. I was Mention It Once, But I Think I am Get Away with It.
Unless you have been living in a yurt (which is a tent containing pro-biotics), you will have by now have heard of the assortment of people, made homeless by predatory borrowing, who are making themselves at [...]

Didn’t You Kill My Brother?
As goes the old saying
Big fleas are having little fleas upon their backs which are bite them, and little fleas have even littler fleas, and so on until you get to the littlest.
What I am referencing here to on this occasion by my witty apothegm above is the recent case of [...]

That Keith Richards has really let himself go, hasn’t he?
Quizmistress Anne Robinson: Which Mick is the lead singer of the Rolling Stones?
Idiot English Contestant: Is it Bono?
Those for whom Irish music is epitomized by the seisiún or the céilí, featuring a bodhrán player, a guitarist, a fiddler, a tin whistler and Shane MacGowan, will be [...]

Few people know that the Palace of Versailles is based on Bagenalstown railway station.
Carole-Anne Delaney must have extraordinary influence within the Irish media, or else the jungle drums of County Wicklow work remarkably fast. I was no more than ten minutes up the road, having escaped from her clutches, when I noticed people waving at [...]

“You’re not from around these parts, are you, Señor?”
“On the run from the authorities and living in Cork.”
“Died in the arms of a rent boy from a methamphetamine overdose.”
“Lost his house in a poker game, went insane, now raising llamas in Monaghan for gladiatorial combat.”
“Locked herself in a cellar in 2005 and refuses to come [...]

It’s What’s Underneath That Counts! (Not the Udders)
“What is the most common expression in Ireland?”
This was the question which was pose for a competition recently in one of Ireland’s most wide-read magazines, Ireland’s Own (target demographic: widows/spinsters aged 90 to 130). Although my subscription to the magazine was let lapse once I retired to the [...]

Why Book Burning was Invented!
I have never been a great fan of Do-It-Yourself, also known as D.I.Why, both for practical and for ideological reasons. In the first place, it is an attitude which is synomynous with anarchism, exemplified by the punk rocking, fanzines, blogging, and masturbation. It reach its apogee in the late 1970s, when [...]