After The Abuse Hurled At Him By Gurriers
after Oliver Goldsmith and Marilyn Monroe
You stand stall, your integrity so vast
you need help from an army officer
dragging it up the steps of aircraft.
Your intellect a Gillette disposable
razor, and matched only
by your ability to make
a simple idea sound complex.
Why evade the issue,
when one can instead engage
You’re bigger to us than Thor,
or Apollo, only with a slightly
different hairstyle. Times
when our thoughts were stuck
on bread and butter, for lack of either;
we’d turn to you for inspiration,
the ripple moving across your
enormous forehead signifying either
impending flatulence or thoughts
on the situation in Nicaragua.
The insult thrown at you last week
the worst a head of state has suffered
since Charles the First lost out
to an axe of questionable parentage.
Though rest assured, all
about Galway, men and women
of consequence are having
heart attacks on your behalf,
and raising glasses
to the man we know
never called anyone